In the realm of communications, the expectation is often that we are masters of all forms of expression. Still, the reality is more complex and distinctly human. For me, the challenge of speaking my thoughts out loud has always been significant. My role demands seamless and effective communication. Yet, I face a personal hurdle that is quite frustrating. My brain is reluctant to cooperate with my mouth in real-time conversations.
I believe that this difficulty partly stems from growing up in an environment where my opinions were often stifled. My voice felt disregarded. I was in a setting where articulating my thoughts was not welcome. My brain learned to hesitate before syncing with my mouth during real-time conversations.
This disconnect isn’t about knowledge or ability. Given some time, I can compose a written piece that accurately reflects my thoughts and intentions. Writing provides me the luxury of time. I can organize my thoughts and choose my words carefully. I can revise until the message is just right. Writing offers me a chance to structure my ideas. I can choose the right words. I refine my message until it fits perfectly. With the introduction of ChatGPT and other GenAI platforms, I now have new resources. It helps me improve and convey my written communication more clearly. But when it comes to the immediacy required in verbal exchanges, that’s where my struggle lies. My mind, buzzing with ideas and responses, somehow hits a roadblock when asked to articulate those thoughts on the spot.
There’s an added layer to my communication: the tendency to shut down in conversations. At times, I find myself withdrawing instead of attempting to engage in dialogue. This leads others to mistakenly assume I’m upset or distant. This reaction does not stem from frustration. It is not from a lack of interest either. Instead, it is a manifestation of my brain’s struggle to cooperate in the moment. It’s a defense mechanism, one that I’ve been working to understand and solve.
It’s a peculiar position to be in, especially when your profession centers around communication. The irony isn’t lost on me. In a world that increasingly values quick, off-the-cuff responses, this challenge can feel like a significant obstacle. Yet, it has been a profound learning journey. It has taught me the value of patience. I have learned the importance of preparation and understanding my own communication style.
Recognizing this challenge, and understanding it stems from my upbringing, has motivated me to create strategies. These strategies help bridge the gap between my rapid-fire thoughts and their verbal expression. I rely on my strengths in written communication. This aspect serves as a foundation for building confidence in my spoken words. I prepare key points ahead of time. I practice out loud. I also allow myself to pause and think during conversations. These have all been invaluable tools.
This journey has also led me to appreciate the diversity of communication styles within the corporate world. We often celebrate the quick thinkers and smooth talkers. Nonetheless, there’s immense value in those who take their time. They craft thoughtful and well-considered responses. It’s a reminder that effective communication isn’t about speed but about connection and understanding.
For those who share this struggle, know that you’re not alone. Embrace your unique communication style. Recognize your strengths. Work patiently on your challenges. These actions can turn perceived weaknesses into unexpected strengths. It’s about finding your voice, even if that voice prefers to express itself in writing before speaking.
I’ve embraced this personal challenge. By understanding its roots, I’ve become a better communicator. Additionally, I’ve become a more empathetic colleague. Understanding my own struggles with communication has deepened my appreciation for the diverse ways people express themselves and connect. It’s a journey that teaches me about resilience. It also enhances my adaptability. I discover the power of finding one’s voice in whatever form that is.
This article was originally posted on LinkedIn on February 22, 2024
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